Dating tips, or how to save your Marriage in one easy lesson

I recently found this blog post:

"Ladies, married ladies, listen up. Now, I know you're all hard working, focused on dis and dat and maybe even have some shawties thrown in the mix. But when's the last time you worked hard on your man? Hmmm, can't remember can you? That's because ladies just don't think of their man's sessual needs on their 500 bullet point To-Do list.

"Recognition is the first step. Asking for help is the next.

"I'm not gonna tell you WHAT you need to do to your man, but I'm gonna help you recognize the signs that your man is about to come apart like a cheap suit."

from Gary Z: 3 Options... Think I'll Save Your Marriage, Ladies

And my first thought is Eliot Spitzer's wife should have read this years ago. As, maybe then, she wouldn't have had to stand next to a person who's been called a lying cheating scumbag, while he was confessing his 'sins' against her.

But, in reality, it takes two to tango and a marriage is both give and take. It constantly baffles me that the majority of American woman don't seem to understand that their husbands have biological needs. And you woman, by agreeing to be married, have committed your life to meeting those needs, and if you don't accept that, you should just start the divorce proceedings already.

Now men, don't think you get off scot free here, your wife has physical, biological, and emotional needs that you too have committed your life to meeting.

It boils down to this. As long as a man isn't a total scumbag, he's not going to stray outside of his marriage, unless his wife forces him to. Just like a woman isn't going to cut her husband off, if he's meeting her needs.

“But what exactly are her needs,” I hear the men roar. Which is a fair question, as I'll guess that for 90+ percent of men their needs are just, well no easy euphemism here, “sex with their spouse” and hence easy for women to figure out and thereby satisfy.

Really though to answer the above question, I can offer up just one thought for both sexes who have a marriage they want to keep. Just ask and be completely honest in your answer.

Husbands, ask your wife what is the single most important thing she desires from you. Wives, asks your husband what is the single most important thing he wants from you. I'll guarantee, that even if you've been married twenty years, the answers will surprise both of you. And don't do that, “Well, that's not what she really means,” BS. If she said she wants flowers delivered every third Thursday of the month to her women's bridge club meeting, then, by god man!, just have them delivered. You want snaps? Deliver them yourself and kiss her quietly on the neck before you leave. Women, you probably already know what your husband wants. He's most likely asked for it before. And long as it doesn't cause you permanent harm, give it to him. Sure, Google it to figure out the best way to make it enjoyable for you. But at the end of the day, ask your self, “Do you love him?” If so, just give him what he wants.

So, in conclusion, a successful marriage can be extraordinarily simple, if a you love your spouse, if your spouse loves you, and you both want the marriage you've agreed to:

Just ask, be honest, and both of you give your partner what they want.

Best of luck all,

M.J. Taylor
Publisher
from Reason to Freedom